30 years with a regular bed.

On December 8, 2016 I had to get a medical bed for the first time in my life. I have fought it off for years and years. This time I couldn't fight it off. In order for me to get this flap surgery that I need for a open wound that I have had for a very long time I had to get this.
I hate it. It's ugly. It's so uncomfortable. Takes me forever to fall asleep now. I have to try, and find position to sleep in. I toss and turn more than half the night. :( My sleeping pattern has changed. It has changed for massively bad for me. It's just not something I wanted. 
Me and my mom mentioned to the doctors that we wanted other options. I was told originally that they would look into other options then they just went back to original choice. A damn medical bed. Even it is jazzed up what's to make a difference it's still a hospital bed. Same thing just spiced up. 

When I do Karaoke.

I may not be the best singer of the night, but I enjoy singing with my friends. I started a few years ago with live band karaoke, but now it doesn’t matter what kind of karaoke it is. If my friends are hosting it, or will be taking part it I’m going to try. It’s another way I can be myself. I love music. I’m not just the girl in the wheelchair. I’m the girl who gets up there, and sings. Although I’d rather not the song or songs myself I’d like to do it with a friend. I feel more comfortable singing with someone else, because if you are suppose to go really high on a note, or a section I can do it lower, and let whomever I’m singing with help me, and do it the right way. Some is hard for me to do, but I will try almost anything except rapping songs. I don’t rap. Karaoke is a way for me to escape for a few hours with whatever is going on in my life. Lately a lot of medical stuff. I can enjoy being with friends. Karaoke is a way for me to get away from everything, and hang out with people I care about. Music is important to me. Whether I’m the one singing, or listening to someone else sing. Either way. I love it.

I'm always the sister or the Best Friend Never anything more..

Every time I think someone likes me it turns out they don't see me anymore than just a friend. A little sister or something like that. Never anything more. I'm getting real tired of it. When do I get my chance at love? I know I'm different being in a wheelchair, but I want my chance at love..
I'm tired of being lonely. I don't do alone well that's why I like hanging out with my friends, but I would take someone who loves me, and cares about me more than just a friend anytime.